Money.... "The root of all evil"??

We all reside in the same planet but we all are far from being in the same place. I woke up today with this in my heart because I have come to the realization that some human beings have this idea that we are all different and we are not, we only have different circumstances. I realized that in this realm where earth resides there are a few things that needs to be understood. 1) that we are far from grasping the concept of who and what we are, 2) we look up or down instead of looking at, and 3) the desire to have what we want is greater than the desire to get what we need. I want to focus on 3 because that has to do with money, and since money has been taught in most religious forums that it is the root of all evil let me break it down to you to show why it is called that. Most of us say it but don't understand what it actually means. "Money" in my opinion is not the root of all evil some people are just evil by nature and due to the fact that some of those people have money, it's easier to blame money instead of blaming who is really at fault. Really? How can a piece of paper really be evil? think about it? The only time something is considered evil is only when it is used with that intent in mind. So the statement implies that in order for something to be evil it has to not only think, it has to be alive and unless money can get up from the federal reserve and march in our pockets I believe it's safe to say that money is an energy that is neutral. It is neither dead or alive it just is. So how can money be the "root" of evil? Now if a man goes to buy a gun to shoot his next door neighbor in the face because he refuses to mow his lawn is money evil in that situation? Most people would say that's not the reason why money is the root of all evil. Money is the root of all evil because people are always fighting and killing each other to get it. Right? No! People fight and kill each other not for money but for a chance to be on top! For the chance to say look world I am recognized! Money has become a tool of lies deceit hate and oh yes murder because human beings don't know how to accept one simple fact.... We are human. Not GODS ....human! A human being can be a master at what they do but when it comes down to it we are all still HUMAN! We have come to a point in our so called evolution that we think to ourselves that we no longer need to believe in certain things. We are too good for that or it is beneath us, but in reality nothing is above or beneath us. Even the being that created us is willing to come face to face with us and speak to us yet we still want to be god or greater   than. We say we have come far but we have not. Most of us are not even grateful for breath we take 
every morning, yet we complain every chance we get. I now understand why we say money is the root of all evil, because money is a the mirror we have created that we cannot erase!!!! It shows us 
what and who we really are in the midst of those who are not capable of having it. It shows us our ugly selves, the part of us we try to deny every time we look at ourselves in the mirror.  So I wrote this to say money is not evil, get as much as you want work as hard as you want to get it but don't let change your beauty. Let it enhance you not destroy you. 

The true journey begins.

Today is a day that I have to write about because today is a day that I understand. I have been many places in my life and all of them has taught me one lesson "it's not all about you!".  I woke up this morning with the most heavy feeling in my heart. I didn't understand why so I went into meditation to find the core of my issue because this is a feeling that is familiar but not that easy to define. As I sat breathing deeply into my subconscious it opens this part if myself I have long forgotten. I saw images of my son who had passed and all of the events that was connected to it at that time. This wasn't so much of a surprise to me because a lot of those memories has been surfacing lately but this one was much different, I had a guide. As the pictures flashed by with the emotions attached to it I asked my guide why did I have to go through this again? I honestly didn't want to remember anything about what had happened. If I had the choice not to remember I would choose not to! I know there are a lot of people that would see this as harsh or insensitive but I would. It's hard enough for a parent to see your child in the hospital for a cold or a broken leg but to see your child in the hospital with tubes running in and out of his head, his stomach, his heart, his arms to witness him having seizures every time you went to see him, to sit in a room where other children are getting better and yours is just getting worse and worse by the day and to be in that situation ALONE when you were able to witness your sons last breath (literally) is nothing I would like to remember but apparently my subconscious and this guide saw it fit for me to relive those memories. Anyway trying to understand why I was going through this my guide showed me who I used to be and who I am in this moment. I have learnt a lot since the passing of my son which I can stand and be proud of but there are things that still haunt  the inner most parts of me that I refused to deal with because it has been too difficult to face. So as I was in meditation I had to be very honest with myself because in that space only truth was allowed. When I say truth I mean what ever resonates with you in that particular moment that has no intent it just is. I realized in that moment that I had a responsibility to my son but like all of those who have lost someone near and dear to the them the question still lingers saying "what did I do wrong"? Maybe if I had prayed more,maybe if I had believed more, maybe if I had done more maybe just maybe my baby would have still been here.  The echo of a scared and broken 20 yr old woman still lingers in my subconscious searching for an answer to the question why did he have to leave? Or more so why did it have to happen at all? To not understand those questions can send one on a search that will lead them in to the most interesting places but not to a place of complete understanding. In some ways you don't want to understand why because it's more of a feeling of if you do understand why then the search will end. Realizing in that moment that my search for truth has been my connection to my son. My son has been with me all this time because I never gave up on him I never gave up trying to find out why! The day he left I felt like he took a part of me but he didn't he actually gave me a reason to truly live.